ellipsis…

tonight, like so many other nights, i find myself once again thinking about the possibility of moving away. most nights it’s not really anything particular, do i really have to sell my car ‘cuz i really love driving that car. but tonight i find myself dweling on something that i’ve realized is quite close to my heart. i’ve thought about being home sick for my family, and missing the really close knit friendships i’ve formed over the years. maybe it’s the fact that i’m listening to damien rice, more likely because i’m just come from it, but tonights dwelling is the youth group that i am still a part of. i found myself trying to calculate, as mr. incredible crushes a robot, how many years i’ve been around. nine years…. and that’s not including pioneer boys with guys like jordan, and joel, and caleb. from the days of hanging out with fop and glen on friday nights, driving around trying for find the best french fry or crayola wars (for those who know). having the biggest crush on the cutest girl leader named carter, i thought i actually saw her the other day. to making the most rediculas videos, a couple sampled on this site. and now hanging with a guy who has been around for longer than i have, running the same youth group that i grew up in.

it has definelty been a large part of my life. and i don’t want to know what life might look like if it hadn’t been such a large part. i look around at the end of every friday night and smile, ‘cuz i know that there were kids just like me here. short, geeky, and needing a place to hang. i’ve never really related to jr/sr high kids all that well. i honestly have no idea how to chat with them, or whatever. though spinning music for five hours straight is a weird talent that i possess, and some how that communicates something about me to them. i don’t know how many kids actually know my name, other than the dj. and if i had it my way, that’s probably how i would want to keep it. i’m the dj that spins everything from top 40 to indie rock to jazz for five hours every friday night at a thing called 98a. i’m good with that.

so it seems that my membership may soon be expiring and that makes me sad. i can attribute my name to things like vississitude, nak-a-mania, bug am, and the long time dreamed, finally accomplished youth centre. what i thought was a passion for high school kids, turned out to be a passoin for helping create an atmosphere where those kids can grow, and connect, and feel like they have a place where they can hang as a short, geeky kid. and if i leave, i will greatly miss my youth group that i am still a part of, even so many years later.

with damien rice now imprinted in my mind, i’m going to steal some of his lyrics. “and so it is” that life goes on, and God has plans that i don’t know of. if i’m going or staying. working or schooling. being single or having a girlfriend. “some things in life may change, and some things they stay the same…. like time” which never seems to stop, even if you yell at it. or wait for it. for something. which seems like what i’ve been doing to for the last year.

Hey ya’ll, i just have a question, in case there are still some junior theologians lurking around this site.

We often talk about Jesus having been a funny guy, see pictures of him smiling, and say that God invented humour. I’m not argueing with any of those things, but I don’t find that in scripture. Jesus is shown to suffer, to be angry, and to weep, all of which we applaud for the human emotion, but where is the verse about Jesus laughing, and goofing off with his diciples? Or even smiling? We take long looks at what the bible has to say, but what about what it doesn’t say?

I’m not really presenting a point here, because i haven’t quite figured it out, though i think i can guess at what a lot of people are going to say. Regardless, i’d like to hear your responses.

- originally posted by jen